A recent archeological dig in the Sahara desert has uncovered a rare parchment that has been given the name of the Genesis Document. Archeologists on site sated:

"This is a very old document produced by an over-zealous mentalist with too much time on his hands, we believe he had nothing better to do than whinge about everything. We think it was written a year before the launch of the now infamous The Incite site and appears to be the inept ramblings of a mind in the early stages of dementia."

When asked what the value of the document was the Archeologist replied:

"Nothing really, it's crap, here see for yourself:

Oh that’s it, that really is the final straw. I have gone insane, I blame Blair, git. Sitting there with his perfect life. Loved by all, adored by the masses, beholden to the most attractive woman on the planet, respected by his enemies, doted on by those who see the true way of a New Labour in a multi-polar unity, measured not by its achievements, but rather its ability to gracefully accept total failure and a couple of lies

At least that’s how the PMs’ Babel fish  seems to be translating it, because I swear the rest of the country is saying “Please stop you cheeky monkey, you jolly well can’t do that, it’s not cricket, its not the British way! While you are at it take that damned honking road traffic accident of a wife, opinionzilla  with you. Please!.”

Lets be British about this shall we. Look its not as if I have nothing better to do you know, but enough is enough. I’m sick of it all, the world is about as wrong as a spatula in the bedroom, one with a pink fluffy handle, giving fair indication that this was NOT intended as a kitchen utensil, given its’ ability to weld  to the skin when exposed to the searing heat of a 10W light bulb, and some studs. It’s in the wrong place, for the wrong reasons!

Oh dear God look at me, I’m sitting here writing content for a website. Hang on let me see if I can go any lower, YEAH BAYBEE! I’m doing it in my underpants.  BUGGER YOU BLAIR, and all you other lil sods that have led me to this. Well, I was in the Army you know! I’m made of sterner stuff! Bred from the compounded years of the finest tactical minds and distilled in the glorious defeat of an empires enemies, with boots ON SAH! I was prepared to go over the top once. I’ll do it AGAIN!

AAAAAAARRRWwwooooooooup, not in underpants.

Not again.